I was on a roll hitting the reject button and I accidentally rejected NRI boy as well. In fact it took me a good ten minutes to recollect who he was in the first place and it was only after thoroughly analyzing his profile did I remember who he was.
Okay.
I feel stupid.
I feel even stupider when I think of how I used to be so crazy about him once upon a time, almost embarrassed of how shallow I was once. But I feel the stupidest when I think of how important he was for me at a point of time in life and how he's someone I vaguely remember now.
So I thought of adding him back and including a message, or rather an apology for my blunder but I decided against it. Why?
Because, with time, I have learnt to control my hormones.
Because, as much fun as we had once had, they are all a part of the long forgotten past now. They're not going to come back. We both are very different people now. People change. Time changes people.
And lastly, because almost all relationships come with an expiry date. They're brilliant while they last but most tend to end. Stretching it or trying to work things out from the scratch once things are over is nothing but a BAD idea. We just HAVE to let go sometimes, for better or for worse.
But really, this post really isn't about NRI boy (who by the way, seems like a person I knew from a long forgotten dream and whose memories I shall cherish, but wouldn't want to relive the dream all over again, no offence to him though. He was the cutest thing I'd ever seen) This is about the tragedy and the heartbreak of/for how most good things always come to an end. You think some things are just perfect and they last forever and bla bla bla, but most of the time, you're mistaken. Now that bit is just fine, everybody goes through it. But the bit that's tragic is how most people are not willing to let go.
You HAVE to let go. Sooner or later, you just do. There was this particular person who I was seeing during my juvenile delinquency days and he was under the impression that just because he loved me, I'd never be able to get over him, no matter what he did to/with me. So I put up with it for a while and eventually broke up with him. He threatened me/begged me to come back but I didn't and eventually I moved on. So what happened to him since? Well the last time I bumped into him, he was with his girl and they looked like two happy little kids. But yeah, it was awkward, as much as I am happy for him. I wish things weren't so bad between us. If only he had let go like I did, maybe we'd atleast be on talking terms then...
And yes, this whole thing about two ex-s not being able to be friends, I think it's rather subjective. I may not be the best-est of friends with my ex, but yeah, we're cool. We're not overtly friendly, but we're not indifferent or intentionally indifferent either and that's probably because we knew that our thing wouldn't last any longer so we did was seemed like the hardest yet the right thing to do-part ways, even though we had been together for nearly three years.
So is my guy cool with me being friends with my ex? I don't think so, but it's just a Hi/Hello-esque thing now so there isn't any reason for him to get worked up for. Would I be cool if he were best friends wit his ex? I don't think so. I trust him but I think this is just a basic human reaction.
yeah, that's right. A basic human reaction, just the way how an ex feels that the person who their former partner is currently seeing can never be as good as them. It's not a feeling that one should be ashamed of. I have felt it. I bet even though my ex may not show it, he feels it too. What's more, I bet my guy has felt it too, at some point of time or the other and even though I don't know his ex, I doubt she'd be an exception.
It's just the way we humans are.
But I'm deviating again. This post was not meant to be about ex boyfriends/ girlfriends/ flings/ waddyacallits either. This was meant to be a simple post about how time changes things. So I think I'll keep it at that.
Goodbye NRI boy and the other similar memories. It was fun while it lasted, but I have other things in life to keep me ticking now and by that I don't necessarily mean new relationships and new friendships and new alliances by the way. :)
