Criminals

As most people my age spend their time these days, I was browsing my newsfeed on facebook when a picture of you popped up. You looked good, beautiful as always.
You've grown your hair out and you seem to have put on a little weight, you still look as gorgeous, but your eyes seemed so tired and so sad.
I miss your tender embrace at times.
You said you'd love me like no other and you did.
I miss speaking to you, holding you, running my hands down your body.
But I loathe you for making me not want to fall in love with a woman ever again.

Things would have turned out so differently if we'd still been together, if you had made up your mind once and for all. We were so happy at one point of time in life, lost in each other and completely oblivious to the homophobic world around us.
But there's no point in dwelling in the past now and I've learnt it the hard way.

I still feel as empty and lost as I did before.
I have seldom felt so lonely and hopeless.
This is quite possibly the worst phase in my life where nothing seems to make sense and everything seems to go all wrong.
I am all alone and I wish you were here, to comfort me and tell me that everything's going to be fine one day.

There was a time when spending even a day without seeing each other would turn our worlds upside-down. I am not being needy though, I am just overwhelmed by how we've become total strangers to each other now.


With a broken heart in dire need of mending and no particular purpose in life, I wonder if you miss me sometimes or even think of me at all...

People's fascination with my love-life makes me feel like such a local celebrity at times.
"is she sleeping with him?"
"did they break up?"
"did you see her with that French dude?"
"I heard she was chatting up that girl the other day"

oh man.
Thank you for adding fuel to my narcissism and making me feel like some kind of a sex-goddess.

There are days, like today for instance, when I feel like tripping on mdma and listen to Bonobo all day.

I miss the anonymity that Delhi had to offer. It was so much easier to do so many wild/crazy things without having to think of the consequences it would have on my "image".

But then again, no vacation is permanent!