Happy And Gay

I was watching an episode of Roadies today, yes, ROADIES, (please don't judge me for it) and I was quite taken aback by their views on homosexuality in India and in general. I didn't quite expect them to speak out in favour of homosexuality so openly, to be very honest. It was very bittersweet. While I really appreciate the producers' (they are also the judges and the hosts of the show) sensitivity towards people with alternate sexualities and the effort that they made in trying to propagate the fact that THERE IS NOTHING WRONG WITH BEING GAY, LESBIAN, BISEXUAL OR TRANSGENDERED, I felt extremely sad at the same time as I watched them interview a candidate who was gay. Why does someone's sexuality become a matter of concern to others in a reality show based on adventures on a bike, how is it even relevant?
Why should the fact that someone is gay or not matter so much to others. We never give a second thought when it comes to accepting straight people in our lives, but why this sudden paranoia when it comes to the LGBT community?
Sadly this ignorance has nothing to do with education. A lot of so called "educated" people still think that being gay is a "disease" or a choice that one consciously makes and can thus be undone by a visit to a shrink.
It's really very sad. I feel disgusted by such ignorance around me. But sadly, people are so obstinate that it's very difficult to make them see the real side of the story.

I often wonder what it would have been like if the person that I am in love with was a woman. Would people treat me as nonchalantly as they do now or shun me like an outcaste, an untouchable? A woman can please me as much as a man can. I don't differentiate between the two. The are both equal to me. Yes, I AM BISEXUAL and if you have a problem with that, well, then you're the one who should change your mindset. There is nothing wrong with me, the problem lies with you.

This contestant on Roadies (whose name, face etc were blurred for privacy) was speaking on behalf of not just himself, but a lot of people and it was so painful to watch. It's so sad how he kept apologizing to his parents for letting them down, ruining their reputation. Why? Because he is gay. Isn't that pathetic? I can't even imagine the trauma that he has to live with, like it's his fault. 

Educate yourself, world.
Don't be so prejudiced, without knowledge.
Today you point your fingers at them, tell them that they don't belong.
Tomorrow, somebody else's definition of an outcaste might just be you!

I Think I'm Dumb

I didn't kill myself like I thought I would. Just been getting high at every given opportunity.
Fuck everything. I enjoy living in solitude anyway.

It's been about 7-8 years since I first started listening to Nirvana. In Utero will always be my favourite album, no matter what. I love them so much it hurts!

"Haters Gonna Hate!"

I have recently discovered that negativity sort of keeps me going and it somehow makes me feel superior than most of the mindless and  alarmingly shallow people that throng this city. I don't mean to offend anybody by saying this but my blog has two very distinct kind of readers-those who enjoy reading what I write and (probably) find inspiration from this and those who stalk because they love to hate me.

Honestly, I don't give a fuck about the latter. It's ironic how people like these act like such heroes in the virtual world-ganging up against someone, spreading hate for no apparent reason. But look a them in real life-so desperate for their 15 seconds of fame. Such incredibly boring and vacant people. I could almost feel sorry for them.
It's amazing how people talk about my private life incessantly. It's even more amazing when they choose public platforms and social networking sites to do so. It used to bother me earlier. But I've been fortunate enough to have collected snippets of advice and wisdom from some of my seniors, all of who have unanimously told me that the more people hate on you for no apparent reason, the more they are jealous of you for achievements they haven't experienced. So anyway, let them dwell in their negativity. I have enough positive vibrations within me to keep going.

Those of you who read this and somehow draw strength from it. Well, it's a two way thing, you make me strong as well. You push me to keep going and I would like to thank all of you for forcing me to get back here. Your feedback is very valuable to me.
The only piece of advice that I can offer, is that you need to love yourself. Everything else will follow suite. Try and love yourself. It's may be a very hard thing to do, but it's not impossible either. I've been trying to start loving myself unconditionally recently. It's a long road, but I know I'll get there someday!