I couldn't remember...
That day, which was crystal clear to me even a year back, has now stopped haunting me. I DO get a few nightmares here and there once in a while, but that's about it. I am no longer scared of being hurt, I have learnt to love again with all my heart, not worrying one bit about the pain that I will have to endure if things turn sour or go horribly wrong somewhere and more importantly, I no longer feel the need to hurt myself for whatever happened to me. I have come of age and I have moved on. Shit happens, big deal. I am proud of myself for not giving up. It's funny when people who know tell me how strong I am and how I never let it show, well I guess when destiny puts you through hell, it also gives you the strength to come out of it.
People have tried to bring me down in the past. People are trying to bring me down. More people will try to bring me down in the future. Not surprisingly these are the people who are either jealous of me or know that they can never be good enough for me. Juvenile incidents would make me break down earlier, but I have learnt to ignore such opinions. I have learnt to separate criticism from bitching- another thing that experience has taught me to do.
I love who I am no matter how fucked up I may appear to you and I wouldn't change a goddamn thing about myself. If you, reading this, are judging me and mistaking my self-confidence for arrogance then I guess you'll never know what this post is really all about!
:)
