I used to hear that it's lonely on top and boy, is that right or what! I turned 20 with a bang, ended my adolescence in the most irresponsible way possible, but I guess growing old doesn't mean that the streak of eccentricity will go away. It's somehow very comforting to know that.
Anyway, last week taught me that just because I'm only 20 and probably one of the very few, people will put me under a microscope and try to bring out my flaws, but I shouldn't let them. It's not everyday when musicians old enough to be your grandfather and your father tell you that you're on the right path and that you should keep at it, since they don't give such timeless advice to any plain Jane wannabe either, I think I should take them seriously and really, I mean REALLY give music a serious thought!
But on the flip-side, I'm taking a huge risk here as well. Let's face it, I have no life whatsoever since I'm constantly on work mode. I wake up, only to go to college, then head to practise from there. I get back home, work on my own music, practise, read a book or procrastinate and then go to sleep, this happens for about 5 times a week, and for the other two days, it's almost the same, except I have a gig at night, after which I get back home and fall back into the cycle once again.
I see people my age in amateur bands have fun, who have so much time for themselves and have such seemingly eventful lives and I can't help but wonder whether or not I am in fact missing out on anything. But I guess I'll never know, cause I will always be a few steps too ahead for others to catch up. It's the price that I have to pay for having the spotlight all to myself.
Boyfriend and I had this crazy theory that it's very hard to stay here in Kolkata, make music and be in a relationship with someone who is not a fellow musician (!) but with time, I realise that somehow it's true. I'm not talking about jokers who're think they're musicians, but the true gems, the kind of life that one has to lead is not all that glamorous. Once they get off of that stage, only some of us know what they really are. Their stories are quite alike horror stories. The mere thought of living their lives gives me the creeps.
Maybe things will change one day and we will be at par with the others, but the way things are going thanks to this new government, I doubt it'd be anytime soon. I mean, c'mon you were voted to power to do something constructive for the state, not pocket the public's wealth. Old party, new party. New dog, old dog. Good dog, bad dog, they're all the same really! None of them give a shit. Like a chain that is being passed down generations after generation, the process and effects of corruption are continual.
But even more appalling is how uneducated the youth today really are. Like brain dead zombies, they all know their abc's and their 123's but the truth is none of them are able to THINK about anything that they haven't been taught in school/college. I fail to realise how lack of knowledge can ever be a "cool" thing. They may score a cent percent in their exam , but try to strike up a conversation with them about anything apart from the latest gossip and see how miserably they fail.
"I don't read books.
I listen to limited music.
I like to conform to societal pressure.
I don't read the newspaper.
I don't like to explore, think new things
Hell, I don't even like to think
I think it's cool to hate those who do"
-this sort of (though arbitrary) sums up the general attitude of my "generation".
But you know what, I'm not going to crib, I belong to that group of people who will use this as an opportunity to move past all others and leave a mark.
A lot of people, most infact, seem to hate Lady GaGa, but the more I think of her, the more she seems to inspire me. She's this fucking goddess, who has let go of everything, shed all her inhibitions and is being herself every second of her life without worrying about what society feels about her. Her songs may be shallow and "too pop-ish" to a lot of people, but I think they're being judgmental and prejudiced-which is EXACTLY what Lady Gaga speaks out against. So the next time you listen to the song 'Born This Way' by Lady GaGa, please listen without prejudice and think, really think, about what she's really trying to tell you. If you STILL don't get it, then you're a dunce who probably never will, clinging too hard to all your morals and all your pre-conceived notions.
So I think she's not just a pop-star gyrating in her videos, I think she's a true artist. If you think I'm a fool for saying this about her and not some band screeching/growling/whatever their lungs out uselessly, then it's not really my problem now, is it? Atleast I don't judge music on the basis of genre, so who's the bigger fool?
Till then, peace ahoy!
:)
